Fortunately, that all changed.
As I hopped on, I told myself 5 miles. Then, it was 4 miles...5 miles if I'm "feelin it". This got me to thinking about the stages that I go through when I'm on the treadmill. They're eerily similar to the 5 stages of grief.
- Denial - "Treadmill runs aren't so bad. I don't have to worry about weather, getting smacked by a Buick. If I want to go up a hill, I can go up a hill. If I want to run a 9:15/mile pace, I can just set the timer. No guesswork. It's actually pretty nice."
- Anger - "Jesus, I've only been running for 2 miles???!!! I think this @#$%@#@ timer is broken!"
- Bargaining - "OK, maybe if I just run 4 miles, I can sneak in 2 miles tomorrow (normally an off day) and call it even. I mean, I'm recovering from (cue echo) the most ferocious cold known to mankind.
- Depression - "This sucks. My legs hurt. My back hurts. I look like an idiot running in place. My iPod shuffle is not shuffling the way it should be. I'm never going to make 13.1 miles at this point. I don't have anything to write about in my blog. Ugh."
- Acceptance - "Well, hell. You've gotten this far. You only have .5 miles left. You've pretty much done it. Just read the closed captioning on Oprah and get it over with."
19 comments:
Ok. You teach at a high school where you're free to watch Oprah while working out alongside the football team? Is it a powderpuff team?
I love your 5 stages!!! I feel the same thing as you went. Move over Elizabeth Kubler-Ross!!!!
I don't think I ever get past the Anger stage, but maybe that's because I'm not watching Oprah when I run on my treadmill. I can definitely see how you'd quickly move on to depression if you were watching Oprah AND running on a treadmill. *shudders*
I love it! Personally, I have never gotten past the "anger" stage.
Right there with you. Ugh, how I hate the treadmill.
I love your stages. I with Jess though, I seem to stay at the anger stage.
I freakin hate the treadmill and go through those stages whether its 1 mile or 5 (cant go any further than that on the treadmill....just simply cant!) haha. Great job!
Hey Razz, this goes in the category of classic posts. I think you should put it on Runner's Lounge! Very nice!
Amen! I go through these stages - just didn't know their names! Nancy sent me a note and told me how great this post was - if you don't mind - I would love to add it to the Lounge Articles.
Amy
amy@runnerslounge.com
Don't forget the other stage of running on the treadmill - the sheer annoyance at the other people around you. "Yo - old dude with the incline maxed out but you are HANGING ON for dear life with your feet dragging behind you? LOWER THE INCLINE, you aren't fooling anyone (unless you are focusing on upper body today)"
And quit scuffing your feet people -- the squeaking is driving me insane!
Oh - but the eye candy is tastier in the gym than on the road.
That? Is hilarious. I am guilty of bargaining all the damn time...
But I watch Dr. Phil. And then write haikus about it.
But - if you were watching the weight lifting kids, then you were not REALLY watching Oprah. Or is that just a cover story??
Hilarious. I never get past the Denial Stage. I try to talk myself into the treadmill, but I'd rather put a fork in my eye.
The kid story is nice, though. Love that team support!
I hate the treadmill. Hate it. Hate it. Hate it. (and with this storm coming through I know I'm bound to it tomorrow night).
That's so wonderful you were able to watch the record be broken. Kudos to the kid!
i guess i'm just odd. the treadmill doesn't bother me, but then again, it's rare that i'm on one. and for as much as i run trails, you'd think i'd be on the opposite side of the spectrum. for me, though, treadmill running is more uncomfortable for those around me.
i sweat.
a lot.
i swear my machine looks like i dumped my water bottle all over it by the time i finish a run. and i KNOW i'm flinging that junk all over the place, too. i actually wait for a 'mill on the end and then warn people who get on next to me.
i DO make sure it's cleaner than when i started, afterwards.
OMG...this is so me! And I will go through the stages again this afternoon when I once again face the treadmill!! So funny!
Perfect.
The treadmill in the gym at my workplace has no TV. It faces a window looking out on the back of a townhouse development. Nothing ever happens. Time seels to slow to half-speed. Sometimes I think treadmills are evil.
I usually make it to the bargaining stage, then strike a deal with myself and get off the darn thing. And the next day I can never motivate myself to get back on. UGH.
I can relate to this, especially the "acceptance" part, and just hanging on for the last .5 or so.
I hate dreadmills! I would much rather bushwhack at night through the woods in shorts at 25F, and totally exfoliate my legs into scratched-up bloody stumps, (like I did last night), rather than do the dreadmill thing.
Happy trails,
Bad Ben
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