Monday, August 3, 2009


Saturday began with the hopes of a long run before our day started in Des Moines. Oh, that's right, no it didn't. I opted to take Saturday off leaving me no option to get my long run in on Sunday. Here's how my Saturday played out:

6:45am - Woke up to the sound of "MOMMY! DADDY!" emanating from my 2 year old son's room. I tried to pretend to not hear it so my wife would "take care" of him. RazZDoodle needs his beauty sleep.

8:30am - Visited the Des Moines' farmer's market which, by the way, kicks some serious organic ass. No lie.

12pm - Considered a beer for a job well-done for putting my son down for his nap.

2:30pm - Picked up my sister from the Des Moines International Airport. International? Really? How classy.

3:30pm - Congratulated myself for being an exceptional navigator to and from the airport by making myself a gin and tonic (Boodles).

3:45pm - Decided that I better hold off after this drink because of my long run.

3:46pm - Decided that I'm not running tomorrow.

Repeat 3:30pm, 3:45pm, 3:46pm until about 10pm.

10pm - Drink copious amounts of water and down a couple Advil.

Sunday came early and I felt OK, so I wandered out and began my run. All was well. It was a nice morning and I was cruising with nary a sign of a hangover. At about mile 2, I approaced a wooded trail. About .25 miles into that trail, a big deer stood in my way. WTF? What the hell do I do? We locked eyes and it was either:

A) Run past him and explain to him that, because I have thumbs, I should be able to pass.
B) Tell him I like deer jerky (not a euphemism).
C) Reverse! Reverse! Reverse!

I think we can all pretty much determine that C was my only option. Either that, or I'm this guy but with less camouflage:

I backtrack and, to get my miles in, I decide to "explore" the area. Well, my "exploration" turned my intended 7 mile run into 9. Whoops. I think what I'm going to need to do is, rather than wear my Garmin, I need to mount those little deer whistles that people put on the hood of their car onto my shoes. That'll show 'em!


Xenia said...

What, you didn't think you could take on Bambi?


Jess said...

Did youa ctually see a deer, or was this part of the "non-existent handgover"?

X-Country2 said...

You RAN from a deer? And you call yourself a Nebraskan. Pfft. You're not even fit to wear those Husker shoes.

Nitmos said...

This is pretty transparent. The time stamps are just an obvious way to disguise bullet points. No one is falling for it.

Viper said...

Pansy. I saw two deer on the path at the end of my 20-miler. I ran toward them and they bounded away. I didn't even find it worthy of blogging ... but now that I can use it to make fun of you ...

The Sean said...

Enjoying reading through your thoughts. Pretty funny, inforamtive... wait what was the point here?

The Sean said...

informative that is
(I like leaving comments just to write more random words in random fonts.) 'ciontsa'

Rural Runner E said...

you are a better man than I am. if I had the saturday you had, I would have taken Sunday off as well.

Adam said...

Doesn't everything in Des Moines kick some serious ass? Shoot, we(they) even have a Nebr Furniture Mart now. Next up, building a chimney rock.

Vanilla said...

Yeah, I'm going to have to call you out on this. Running away from a deer is weak.

M2Marathon said...

Running away from a mountain lion or bear: acceptable and wise. Running away from a deer? I'm not even sure you can call yourself a human! According to Born to Run this is the only reason we humans evolved to run in the first place!

Plus, a good Nebraskan would have had his gun with him, and made dinner of that deer...